Sex on Tap - dating in the now

We are on the verge of a catastrophe.

Those were the exact words Izzy uttered when she rang me with her latest online dating mishap. Mr ‘Appears to Have It All’ had just sent her a dick pic. And not just one, he had them coming from all angles just to be sure she got the message. And she did, loud and clear. Her response was quickly received – BLOCKED.

He called moments later in a panic, his voice a quiver; she could practically smell the sweat down the line. Why had she blocked him? Was that not what she wanted?

Ding. Ding. Boys, catch onto one thing fast, no girl likes a dick pic. Ever. It’s not that it’s not pretty, but it’s not the first thing to get us all in a tizzy. Crotch shots may work for you but try something more subtle with a little more class if you want to lure a girl into bed, like the chilled champagne and glasses in the fridge, or a ton of treats with the tv remote; these things melt knickers much quicker than any naked shot is likely to. And if you’re a Mr ‘Appears to Have It All’ and haven’t even hit date one yet, you’re quickly being slammed with the pervert sticker and shifted into the abyss of other online pests.

She was nonchalant . Bored. Painting her nails while she himmed and haad at his excuses until he said the one line that wound him up with date number one – It seems to be what girls want on here.

Pause. Re-wind and tell us that again!

Dating apps are changing the world as we know it. Girls no longer play hard to get, it seems they’ve caught up with the boys and don’t see why not. They’re busy, empowered and need to get laid. They don’t want dates or falsities, they don’t even want relationships. They love their lives. They have friends, family, money and success. Who needs a partner? There are men flowing down the wifi lines like chocolate, why settle for one type when you could have another? They’ll wake boys with sexts in the middle of the night and land on the doorstep in their underwear. They’ll meet for a drink with a room key pre-paid and a dinner date booked for after. Women are no longer sitting back and waiting for men to decide what it is they want. They’re making it theirs before the game even kicks off. And it’s all about one thing – sex.

Dating apps are sex on tap. One in, one out and start it all over again. In a world that moves faster than water, who has the time for the in between stuff? But what if you’re not out for just sex? What if you’re looking for a person to share more than your body with?

This is where it gets tricky. Hitting blocked is easy, but now that men are using sex as bait, laying themselves down like a fly to a spider, how are we to know the true intentions of anyone out there?

Women are changing the rules and I’m not so sure it’s for the better. As for Izzy, he realized that as fun as it is when women hold the sex card, it’s actually much more of a turn on when they hold it out of reach, because ladies, whether we like it or not, some things do not change with time and a mans respect for a woman who is hard to get, is one of them.

This article is my 42nd oldest. It is 600 words long, and it’s got 7 comments for now.