Porn - yes, no or maybe?

We all know about porn. The thing is, when it comes to a functioning relationship, is it a good or a bad thing?

Porn is one of those sly natured things. It doesn’t come hurtling out of the bush and throw you on your back. No, it’s much, much more discreet than that. Porn is smart. It works on you slowly from a relatively young age. Before you’re old enough to know what you’re watching, it’s already leaving its subtle, silky imprint on that part of your innocent brain that smells out sex like a dog finds meat. Lurid and smutty, or loving and tentative, whatever the effect– it’s there.

I started young. Child of the eighties, porn watcher of the early nineties. The chances are, you all secretly watched EuroTrash too. Much like all my friends it started innocently, tucked beneath a quilt at my best friends house, the duvet over our heads to disguise the flashing screen (because even then, without knowing why, we knew it was wrong), the volume turned down to a whisper, so you had to breath in tiny, hushed breaths just to hear the lush French accents. It was an early nineties intro to softer than soft porn. Forget sex ed, we learnt it all from staring at bonking boobs and buffed bums. We laughed, we winced and occasionally we covered our eyes, but one thing was certain; we always came back for more.

So if we start off with a keen interest prior to boobs and wet dreams, what is to come of us as adults?

The answer to this spans far and wide.

You want to talk porn? Let’s talk porn. There are some men who like it on and not just for a little titillating foreplay, no, these boys are so hooked, that the real thing never quite meets the fantasy and without it, there will be no big bang. Believe me, Chrissy, Jess and most probably Leah, have all met them. Then you have the ones who use it for ideas, I like to see this as research, and when did research ever do anyone any harm? Best of all, this isn’t a one-man job; they like to research with company. Even I have met one of these. And ladies, if you haven’t tried it, give it a go because everyone I know that’s broached the joint porn experience, tends to come away satisfied. Word of warning though, if you have any body hang ups, maybe avoid high end glossy shoots because there is no beating those women’s bodies, then again, there’s no beating the man either, so maybe the pay off is worth it; only you can decide.

Bottom line, if porn is an idea starter, a mind opener, a subtle way to suggest what you want; then use it.

For me, I could take it or leave it. A little viewing is no bad thing but movie marathons or weekly screenings, would be too much to be fun. Isn’t porn like most things, a taste of a good thing leaves you satisfied; go back too often and you can only be disappointed.

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